
The weather is finally cooling here. I can now open my office window without a blast of heat hitting me, and instead I can sit and gaze at the blue mountains with just the tiniest whisper of breezes creeping in instead. And so I do.
I sit and I allow myself the luxury of daydreaming.
Do you do that on a regular basis, the daydreaming? It is a LUXURY that I make myself have.
And it’s not because of lack of time caused by the general mayhem of having two toddlers underfoot that prevents me from daydreaming; it’s the simple fact that I was always told that DAYDREAMING IS BAD.
I am the perpetual dreamer. The perpetual dreamer + student of the world, who loves to immerse herself in learning, in books, in lying in fields come rain or shine and at their happiest point, who just reads and daydreams and imagines herself in a million and one other places and stages and events and occasions.
Dreamers do not dream because they are dissatisfied with life, or because they need an escape, or because they do not value what they have around them- they simply dream because there is no other way.
Yet the way of the dreamer is always viewed as SO BAD, isn’t it?
As if a dreamer can not be also, at the same time, an action-taker.
Perhaps people fear the dreamer so much they worry that one day the dreamer will actually FOLLOW these dreams and perhaps risk everything they do so comfortably have;
perhaps people wonder if they will be left behind;
perhaps people are so naturally designed to FEAR risk; so that to be a dreamer, always dancing on the edge of risk and change, is why many people are nervous and uptight and negative around the dreamer-
The amount of times I have been told over the years, from school to now-
‘Stop daydreaming’
‘Is there anything more interesting out of the window?’
‘What are you staring at?’
and the worst, and the most painful
‘she’s just a dreamer’
As if it were the very WORST thing you could do or be, as if the rest of the world is going to pass you by as you sit and write and draw and shoot and as your mind wanders freely- as if that would be such a bad thing for the world to continue while you stay – gasp- happy and content and needing none of the material things in life, for you would be happy both with or without, as long as you are in pursuit of the dream–
And the worst thing is, dreaming, for the dreamer, often brings untold pain for those who don’t dream in the same way that you do.
When you set up in business, you face the (probably endless) struggle with those who simply don’t understand.
They don’t understand WHY you are doing it, they don’t understand HOW you can ever really achieve what it is you are dreaming of, and they are absolutely terrified or in disbelief of the RISK that comes along with actually following everything that you have set out to.
Or perhaps, you are blessed. And, for a moment at least, you do have support, kindness, love, from every angle.
But is this without boundary or without definition- is this true, endless, unlimited support no matter what?
Perhaps you have experienced support for a while but then when it comes to taking REAL risk – a huge business loan, spending a LOT of money on equipment, spending a large period of time overseas to follow a particular project, deciding to go in a brand new direction or make a huge new business investment- or even the day-to-day SLOG of running a business for YEARS without seeing much real FRUIT starts to seem like a liability rather than an asset-
Perhaps then you have experienced support of your dream that starts to wane and fade. The reality is that THIS LIFE- this way of the dreamer – is HARD for those attached to us. Who have fallen for the dreamers, who rely on the dreamers, who fall in love with starry eyes and spirit that is hard to capture – they WANT the romance and the adventure, but HATE the unsecurity and the RISK that comes along with being, well- YOU-
Because this is the REAL problem with being a dreamer.
The
Dreams
Don’t
Stop.
They continue and they get bigger and bigger and you dream of doing more and helping more and serving more. Always, more more more.
Yes you know that your own dreams leave you yourself quite breathless sometimes, and your own mind racing to catch up with itself, and even in your own heart and mind you struggle to realise – how on earth how am I actually going to DO everything that I want to do? And so you completely understand why to someone who is attached to you might not truly ever be able to get their head around what on earth you are doing or WHY you are doing it or even any of it whatsoever; you completely understand that you come across as an overwhelming, head-exploding, big bundle of RISK to MOST PEOPLE but this doesn’t ever hold you back or stop you
Because you know
You will get there
And so you just go on and DO it, you MAKE your dreams a reality in every step that you take whether they fail or falter or fly, every movement is a movement forward.
And sometimes our REAL dreams for our business + life lay hidden for YEARS, it can be so hard to say THIS? THIS IS NO LONGER REMAINING JUST A DREAM and bringing it into the light to become the living and breathing thing that you truly WANT and desire, but the point here that I am trying to make to you is this.
You are a dreamer.
It is why you are here.
It is why you started your business in the first place.
It’s because you dared to want something MORE.
And even if you quit or leave or pause or break – the dreams have begun now, they’ve been opened and are swirling around and they will NEVER stop.
You can’t put the genie back in the bottle.
So what are you going to do, really?
Are you going to let those who refuse the way of the dreamer hold you back?
Are you going to let the ‘we can’t afford it’ the ‘your business isn’t making any money’ the ‘you’re just a dreamer’
hold you back?
And if you know damn well you’ve already popped that cork, your dreams are in full flow, everything is going beautifully or at least in the general vague direction that it is supposed to and this ISN’T defined by income or profit but instead just the feeling of KNOWING;
are you going to let those FEARS that everyone else holds for you-
the ‘don’t ruin it’ ‘don’t mess it up’ ‘don’t put all of your eggs in one basket’ ‘don’t risk what you have’
are you going to let THOSE hold you back now?!?!
If I could tell you something this morning. As I sit with my coffee, staring out at the mountains, it would be this-
WANT WHAT YOU WANT.
Dream how you want to dream.
There will always be those who love you who are risk-averse, fearful; those who think smaller than you do, or who – with terrific sadness – you seem to be pulling away from, as you follow the only path and way that you know, dreamer.
Because the thing is- they most likely will not see the world in the way that you do, when you want them to, on your timeframe, in YOUR way.
As full of endless and unlimited opportunity, as defined by YOU.
It is not your job to be their teacher. To try to persuade or convince them otherwise. To spend your precious energy and words pouring into ears that are not ready to hear and a heart that is not ready to open.
And you do not need to leave them, just like you do not leave your dreams.
You just go on and BE.
Be who you are supposed to be, want what you want.
Because otherwise, what is the cost?
To cage yourself, in golden bars maybe, but with the spirit of who you are always seeking an exit?
To dream smaller, perhaps, or to stop dreaming all together?
To perhaps maybe, seek + find more joy in being in the present, in the everyday, in the BEING here + now- but then always to have that small part of you that you ignore, that part that whispers to you when you are alone and staring out of a window – what if…?
And that is why I take deliberate and specific time to daydream, staring at the mountains, turned towards the delicate morning.
THIS is how we forget a business grows, when we are full to the brim of deadlines and sessions and diaries and online marketing.
THIS is how the dreamer makes her dreams reality.
When the dreaming never stops.
When the dreams are nurtured.
When the dreams are given the permission they need to become a reality.
Let those who say dreaming is tiring or pointless or a waste of time say whatever it is they need to.
You know that without the dream, without the heart, without the intention, the goal, the focus-
Business? It’s just a series of steps designed to make you money, and it can and will, but happiness? You know happiness isn’t found in the money.
It’s in the pursuit of your artist’s heart + your soul + in following who you are and who you are supposed to be. It’s following that thing, that feeling- that says to you, you must do this, and do it regardless, every single day. And sometimes the words will be quiet and sometimes they will scream at you, but regardless you KNOW that you have no choice really – follow the call and be happy, or ignore it or smother it and always, always feel that PAIN- and that’s the only way to describe it – that pain of longing or wondering, for things to be different-
So right now I want to ask you –
Are you making time to deliberately daydream for yourself and your business?
Are you letting the thoughts + opinions of others, of society, hold you back from being who you are supposed to be?
Are you dreaming SMALL, or are you too scared to dream in the way that you want to for your business?
Are your daily actions moving you towards the direction of your dreams?
Who are you letting hold you back right now and what do you need to do to move forward?
Leave a comment below- I’d love to hear from fellow dreamers <3
Want to join more dreamers + BIG ACTION TAKERS in business? Check out Shining Lights, here.
Hey Charlie,
as always, your post is spot on and comes just at the right time. As if you knew, when we need that gentle kick in the butt.
I am a hopelessly romantic dreamer, always have been. Your words made me cry! I cried because it’s hard to be a dreamer in today’s world, when all that matters is numbers and facts.
I would LOVE to finally spread my wings and start my photography business. BUT, the realists around me make it hard to jump. I’ve had my own business before, which I loved and put all my life-blood into. It failed. And it was called an “just expensive hobby” by the person closest to me. Even after ten years, his words are echoing in my head.
Now, I’m starting to think that I will always get stuck at the daydream-stage of my passion.
And, as I too look at the blue sky outside my window, more tears are rolling down my cheek … Monika
Thank you for your reply Monika…your beautiful reply.
It is hard to be a dreamer you are right. My first business failed too. Don’t be afraid to fail- perhaps the lessons you learned first time around were essential for you to succeed the next time?
Most successful entrepreneurs have a list of failures behind them, yet we are taught to fear failure… another way of holding back the dreamer perhaps?
How can you start to do what you dream of, and not listen to the wounds and words of the past? Does moving forward make you feel happier than staying where you are, right now? And when you failed- did you get through the failure? In the grand scheme of life- does it even MATTER, that you ‘failed’?
Perhaps failures are successes in disguise. They are certainly great teachers.
Sending you love + light.
Thank you Charlie!
No tears today! I promise!
I’ve listened to your wise words. I’ve thought about them. And you know what, I’m proud to be a dreamer! I always will be, because it’s inside me. In everything I do, think or create. No adversity in my life so far, has been able to kill it. And I’m not going to let it. I’ll fight for it.
I believe in the good and the beautiful around us. I believe that if we stop dreaming and loving, this world will be a sad place. In a way it already is. But I refuse to give up on the good and the beautiful.
The same goes for my business. You’re right about the failures. I’ve made mistakes, but I’ll learn from them. Maybe, I’ll make others, but as you pointed out, “Would I be happier staying where I am now?”
No! Because, as you said, dreaming never stops, and if it’s nurtured, it can turn into something magical. THAT’S what I’m going to do with my dreams. Turn them into something magical, and inspire others to follow.
God bless you Charlie!
With Love, Monika