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LIFE

The Power of a Picture

February 12, 2017 by Jen Dziuvenis Leave a Comment

The Power of a Picture

We lost our beloved 11-year-old lab last year. She was an amazing dog who lived a great big life. She had shown little sign of slowing down in the ten years she had been a part of our family. Sometimes I didn’t believe she was a senior at all.

Then one night she didn’t want to eat dinner. A week later she was gone.

I’ll spare you the details of that week because, if you have lost a pet you love, you probably already understand the anguish. You know what it is like to have that rock drop on you from a thousand feet up and knock you off balance for weeks. You know how hard it is and how much it hurts.

I’m not here to talk to you about that. I’m here to talk to you about why I’m so damn happy that I busted out my camera in her last couple days. And why I will cherish these photos forever.

Maddie died in the middle of the night on our living room floor. The tumor that had been growing on her spleen ruptured and in a few hours she went from being her gorgeous, bouncy self to completely unable to walk. It was midnight and she was fading fast. Taking her to the vet would have meant carrying her to the car, driving her across town in the dark, and hauling her suddenly frail body into an animal hospital that she had never been to. I suspected she wouldn’t last very long and I didn’t want to stress her out more. So we stayed home and within an hour she was gone.

While her final decline was mercifully fast in the grand scheme of things, it was still hard to watch. This is a dog that spent her years climbing mountains and running through forests and suddenly, in a matter of an hour, she had lost control of her body. I crawled into bed after we lost her with the image of her struggle fresh in my mind. It wasn’t what I wanted to remember.

In the blur of the next morning I came across the picture above and realized it was the last one I took of her. It was just the day before she passed and she had been feeling great. When she curled up to take a nap in a sunny spot, one of her favorite things to do, I pulled out my camera to capture it.

She looks like a peaceful, sleeping angel in that picture. And this image has replaced the ones of her struggling. Because the reality is that while her last couple hours were tough, they don’t represent the reality of her final days. Her last week on earth was peaceful – and thanks in large part to this picture, this is how I remember them.

There’s a lot of reasons I love photography and it’s ability to help you shape the way you remember the past is certainly one of them. It can’t change the things that happened or bring back the dog that I loved. But it can impact the way I remember her final days. And for that I will be forever grateful.

Filed Under: Featured2, INSPIRE, Jen Dziuvenis, LIFE, Uncategorized

Beyond the Law: My Unlikely Path to Professional Photography

January 31, 2017 by Jen Dziuvenis Leave a Comment

Beyond the Law: My Unlikely Path to Professional Photography

 Ten years ago, I was finishing my last year of law school, preparing for the bar exam, and looking forward to a stressful career sitting behind a desk, navigating the American legal system. If you had told me that nearly a decade later I’d be getting paid to follow adventurous couples into the backcountry or jetting off to Iceland to photograph an elopement, I would have told you that you were nuts.

But that’s where I am and I wanted to share a bit about how I got here.

As with many of the best changes in life, my move into the world of professional photography was brought on by some pretty extreme discomfort. My “real” job had been making me miserable for way too long when one day I hit a breaking point. I realized that the small amount of money I was taking home after I paid for our son’s daycare wasn’t worth the anxiety I was experiencing at work … and that continuing to do what I was doing was the definition of insanity.

That night I had a heart-to-heart with my family, drank a couple glasses of wine, and mustered up a heaping dose of courage. There may have been some tears. Turning in my resignation the following day was equal parts scary and liberating. I didn’t know what was next but I was damn sure that I needed to be doing something different.

Beyond the Law: My Unlikely Path to Professional Photography

All images by Jen Dziuvenis.

At that time I had been doing photography as a hobby for several years, mostly taking pictures of pretty landscapes and crazy cyclists ripping up trails in the mountains. Friends had asked me to take their family photos or suggested that I shoot their weddings and I had flatly refused. “That’s not really what I do …” were the words that came out of my mouth.

“No freaking way!” is what I said in my head.

Being a wedding photographer couldn’t have been farther off my radar. I didn’t especially enjoy going to weddings. Why would I want to photograph them?

Then one day, through the magic of social media, I stumbled on photographers who were doing stuff that I loved — work that spoke to my sense of adventure and search for authentic connection. People like Ben Sasso and Jordan Voth completely changed my idea of what wedding and portrait photography could be. Stiff, awkward poses were replaced with real emotion, undeniable human connection, and some of the most incredible landscapes on earth. A fire had been lit.

Beyond the Law: My Unlikely Path to Professional Photography

I decided to step out of my comfort zone and try my hand at photographing humans. I begged my friends to model for me and answered Craigslist ads looking for photographers. I connected with an online community of local photographers and did some second shooting at weddings. I agree when a friend offered to pay me to shoot her own wedding day.

I was scared as hell and full of doubt. I did it anyway.


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In a span of a few months photography went from an expensive hobby to a baby business that was bringing in enough money to convince me that this could actually be a thing. I booked a few weddings, doubled my rates, and booked some more. I invested in training and equipment. I landed my first international destination wedding. I had photos go wildly viral. For a very new business, I was having far more success than I had ever imagined was possible.

mandydavidDC-561

That’s not to say that it’s been easy or that I’ve been able to turn this into a fulltime gig overnight. Even with quick success, it’s slow going and a huge percentage of what I make goes straight back into the business. I’m working harder than I ever have — and doing it for less money.

And yanno what? I’m loving every damn minute of it.

I had a regularly occurring meeting at my last job that caused me considerable anxiety. Every few weeks it would pop up on my schedule and I’d curse and cringe. I left it on my calendar when I quit that job as a constant reminder of why I left. That message still pops up every two weeks but now it doesn’t cause me angst. Now it makes me feel proud. It’s a reminder that I left that world behind, took control of my life, and am hustling like hell to pursue my passions.

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Filed Under: Featured1, HUSTLE, INSPIRE, Jen Dziuvenis, LIFE, MOTIVATE, SHOOT, Starting Out, WORK IT

How To Use Being An Introvert To Grow Your Business

August 31, 2015 by The FCA 2 Comments

How To Use Being An Introvert To Grow Your Business

How do you overcome being an introvert entrepreneur, especially when it comes to marketing your business?

After all, generally, the very nature of being in business as a photographer usually demands that you are present at social occasions, and not just present but absolutely LOVING it- because how can you NOT love something that is so intrinsically part of your business?

But… the only thing is… sometimes, there is just this voice, isn’t there?

This little voice that says/ screams from within that says ‘Hey… I’m not actually enjoying this AT ALL’.

And actually, being surrounded by people may or not be enjoyable for you, but it’s the little parts of business that sometimes make you sit and wonder whether you’re really cut out for this, right?

The marketing. The networking. The small-talk at shoots and at events. Even PHONE CALLS can cause a bit of panic mode to creep in (or in my case, a lot). Those face to face meetings. All of it, for the true introvert can equal STRESS CENTRAL and as for enjoyment? That would be somewhat of a BIG FAT OVERSTATEMENT.

Here is my not-so-secret-secret- I am a massive introvert. 

Nobody EVER believes me.

Why? Because I don’t come across as shy and quiet.

As if those are the only qualities that make up an introvert!

An introvert – is this you? – purely and simply, just doesn’t get their energy from being around people. As my husband likes to tell me ‘you just hate people’ which is entirely untrue, it just means I would absolutely one million per cent, rather stay in and read a book than go out and party with a room full of strangers. I would rather go to a restaurant than a bar, hen-dos of the traditional kind literally make me cringe, meeting new people makes me shake on the inside.

I know, right? LOSER!

And perhaps the saddest part of this is that I actually used to believe that about myself!

That because I hated going out, would rather stay in, and would rather wilt in the corner of a party than actually go and say hello to people, I actually felt like a big social loser. 

I’m not saying you feel like that at all, and I actually pray to God you don’t, as for so long I tried to fit myself into other people’s standards and ideals of fun and pleasure. (Now, I very happily embrace the fact I am a complete nerd and this website wouldn’t exist without it so… those university party-free nights obviously paid off somewhere).

But the point is- if you are an introvert, in business, you probably wonder from time to time how this is holding you back.

You know you should be marketing more. You wonder if you are saying or doing the right things at client meetings. Perhaps you wonder too much what people are thinking of you. You wonder if you really should be arranging meetings with the Influencers and cool people in your industry. Networking your ass off. Giving out your business card to people like you give out handshakes (not that I give out many of those either – STAY AWAY FROM ME GODDAMNIT I’M AN INTROVERT!!!!!!!)

You get what I mean.

IS your introversion holding back your business?!?!

And my answer might surprise you.

Because I am going to tell you this.

Yes, absolutely your introversion is holding back your business.

Because you are letting it. 

Ever heard that ‘thoughts become things?’ I think I first heard that in the movie The Secret (which I highly recommend as an introduction to the laws of attraction and how they work, by the way).

Well, I realised something after about a decade in business as a photographer who outwardly was doing great but who was dying a little death on the inside every time I had to rock up to a wedding or a shoot.

I realised that because my introversion had been such a focus of my attention for literally, YEARS- the comments about always being the student who stayed in, being a boring child with ‘her nose always stuck in a book’, and ‘why don’t you go outside and play like the other kids?’ (er, because I don’t find jumping 6ft off swings and smoking cool)?I had kind of started using it as part of my identity, without even realising it.

I was hiding behind it as an excuse not to run my business the way I wanted to run it- because I thought that if I did, I wouldn’t gain business. I thought I HAD to do things ‘ the done way’.

IS your introversion REALLY holding back your business? Only you know for certain, but one thing IS certain; it will do, if you focus on it.

And the more you focus on it, the more aware of it you are, and the more aware of it you are as a ‘negative trait’ reinforced by probably a lot of societal conditioning, (which you probably ARE feeling otherwise you wouldn’t be asking the question about whether it is holding you back) then the more you focus on it as something negative, and so, like predictability itself, it then BECOMES something negative.

When the TRUTH? The real TRUTH about being an introversion in business? Is something entirely different and entirely more beautiful all together.

When you get over beating yourself up about not fitting into everyone else’s standards and start instead reflecting upon yourself as an individual with unique strengths, STRENGTHS LIKE INTROVERSION- you get to start creating a business that makes you HAPPY – in ALL aspects.

When I finally REALISED what a waste of time all of my FEAR had been and how much it had been holding me and my business back, it was a night / day difference for me.

Let me spell this out for you.

Again, in case you didn’t get it.

Introversion is a STRENGTH, not a weakness. So play to your strengths! Just like any great sportsperson, you don’t get great at something by focussing on your weaknesses do you?!? So you have to change the way you think about it- and it certainly ISN’T a weakness in fact I LOVE being an introvert and as I have already mentioned this website almost definitely wouldn’t exist without it because I wouldn’t have spent over a decade of my life reading books and websites and doing courses all about marketing and growing a business! 

And then remember that YOU control your business. Your business is not like some great runaway minetrain with you tied on board like some helpless passenger.

This is your LIFE not just your business and you get to control EVERYTHING about it – the journey, the destination, everything.

Don’t like the view from the window? Change it. 

I stopped doing face to face client meetings. In fact, I amended my email process so that generally, my clients booked without even having to meet me face to face at all until the day of their session, unless I decided I would like to meet them. I took my phone number down from my website as I hate phonecalls with strangers and nothing kills me quicker than small talk. I delegated a loud shouty wedding guest to call for guests for the group shots so I didn’t need to raise my voice. I stopped attending networking meetings all together and it was like angels singing to me. Seriously. Why on earth did I EVER think that was going to be a good idea??? I stopped doing in-person print sales. Hallelujah. In fact, I stopped doing almost everything that I was ‘supposed’ to be doing to run a successful business. 

I got SELFISH – completely entirely selfish, and decided to take the whole of Saturday mornings and into the afternoon, away from my family and even guests we have staying here with us – no matter what, I make sure I have the ‘me-time’- that quiet time for reflection and solitude and peace that us introverts love and start to wither without.

I started to bring out all of the parts of me that I LOVE, the parts of me that thrive BECAUSE of my introversion- the reading, the writing- and created my books, my website, and through that I was able to work with clients that I truly love and barely ever feel conscious around. I will happily jump on a call with them any day of the week! Of course, I feel drained afterwards, because I pour my heart and soul into those calls and I work HARD to get good results so then I go and sit by myself and read and immerse myself in solace until my energy levels lift again.

When shooting weddings I realised I loved having a 2nd shooter with me to help direct, liase with the clients, and ease the pressure off. As an extroverted introvert I can happily socialise and chat if I need to- and do it brilliantly, which is why nobody ever believes me when I say I am intro- but the thing is I don’t LIKE to.

And that is ok. BEING WHO YOU ARE IS OK!!!

In fact, it is better than ok.

Especially when it comes to marketing your business. The internet is marketing HEAVEN for introverts!!! (If you want specific strategies start with growing your email list, blogging/content marketing, facebook ads, facebook groups for starters)

So in answer to the question how does being an introvert hold your creative business back–

It will hold you back- if you focus on it as something that holds you back, and something to hide behind. Why not try EMBRACING your introversion instead and creating a business that works on YOUR TERMS, not what somebody else’s idea of a business SHOULD look like?

Why not instead view introversion as a strength?

As a way of attracting clients who are also introvert and marketing to them specifically?

Or understanding that you can nail your marketing better than almost anyone thanks to the power of the internet?

Or realising that being an intro gives you absolute bona fide excuse to take some very deserved relaxation time on a regular basis?

Or realising that your clients might hate the exact same things that you do- small talk, face to face meetings, etc – which give you an extra advantage as you create your business to reflect primarily your needs but also scoring big for them?

Can you be selfish enough to demand that you take whatever it is that you need to in order for your business to grow? Whether that is time, or new processes, ways of doing things and working that work for you and support you and your energy levels?

And can you answer the really tough question – are you WANTING your introversion to hold back your business?

because to actually remove this part of your identity, this part of yourself that you have clung to for so long, to remove it from your armour means that you no longer have excuses to hide behind and you have to actually GO OUT THERE – in your own, beautifully introverted way, of course- and make this happen for you? 

Because that’s for so long, what so many of us do. We might be introverts, extroverts, live in the wrong area, have no money, aren’t educated enough, etc etc etc. We hide behind an identity that isn’t even our own, cultivated through years of society telling us what to do, how to behave, and formed through our deepest experiences and fears.

Avoiding doing the work necessary to make your business to succeed in the way that you want it to by calling it ‘introversion’ is simply avoiding the work, whether that’s through fear or other causes (though it’s usually fear based in what true success and wealth might mean for you).

Because any good entrepreneur will tell you that there is ALWAYS a way to do something – so the real question here perhaps isn’t

‘is being an introvert holding back my business?’

But

‘Why am I hiding behind introversion as an excuse not to do what I need to do?’

You can create the business + life that you dream of, whenever you want to.  So when are you going to start? How many more excuses do you need to clear out? And how can you make time to nurture your introvert and create a business + life that makes YOU– in all of your perfect introverted glory–  THRIVE?

Filed Under: LIFE, MOTIVATE, ONLINE

Are They Holding Back Your Business?

August 24, 2015 by The FCA 3 Comments

Are They Holding Back Your Business?

The weather is finally cooling here. I can now open my office window without a blast of heat hitting me, and instead I can sit and gaze at the blue mountains with just the tiniest whisper of breezes creeping in instead. And so I do.

I sit and I allow myself the luxury of daydreaming.

Do you do that on a regular basis, the daydreaming? It is a LUXURY that I make myself have.

And it’s not because of lack of time caused by the general mayhem of having two toddlers underfoot that prevents me from daydreaming; it’s the simple fact that I was always told that DAYDREAMING IS BAD.

I am the perpetual dreamer. The perpetual dreamer + student of the world, who loves to immerse herself in learning, in books, in lying in fields come rain or shine and at their happiest point, who just reads and daydreams and imagines herself in a million and one other places and stages and events and occasions.

Dreamers do not dream because they are dissatisfied with life, or because they need an escape, or because they do not value what they have around them- they simply dream because there is no other way.

Yet the way of the dreamer is always viewed as SO BAD, isn’t it?

As if a dreamer can not be also, at the same time, an action-taker.

Perhaps people fear the dreamer so much they worry that one day the dreamer will actually FOLLOW these dreams and perhaps risk everything they do so comfortably have;

perhaps people wonder if they will be left behind;

perhaps people are so naturally designed to FEAR risk; so that to be a dreamer, always dancing on the edge of risk and change, is why many people are nervous and uptight and negative around the dreamer-

The amount of times I have been told over the years, from school to now-

‘Stop daydreaming’

‘Is there anything more interesting out of the window?’

‘What are you staring at?’

and the worst, and the most painful

‘she’s just a dreamer’

As if it were the very WORST thing you could do or be, as if the rest of the world is going to pass you by as you sit and write and draw and shoot and as your mind wanders freely- as if that would be such a bad thing for the world to continue while you stay – gasp- happy and content and needing none of the material things in life, for you would be happy both with or without, as long as you are in pursuit of the dream–

And the worst thing is, dreaming, for the dreamer, often brings untold pain for those who don’t dream in the same way that you do.

When you set up in business, you face the (probably endless) struggle with those who simply don’t understand.

They don’t understand WHY you are doing it, they don’t understand HOW you can ever really achieve what it is you are dreaming of, and they are absolutely terrified or in disbelief of the RISK that comes along with actually following everything that you have set out to.

Or perhaps, you are blessed. And, for a moment at least, you do have support, kindness, love, from every angle.

But is this without boundary or without definition- is this true, endless, unlimited support no matter what?

Perhaps you have experienced support for a while but then when it comes to taking REAL risk – a huge business loan, spending a LOT of money on equipment, spending a large period of time overseas to follow a particular project, deciding to go in a brand new direction or make a huge new business investment- or even the day-to-day SLOG of running a business for YEARS without seeing much real FRUIT starts to seem like a liability rather than an asset-

Perhaps then you have experienced support of your dream that starts to wane and fade. The reality is that THIS LIFE- this way of the dreamer – is HARD for those attached to us. Who have fallen for the dreamers, who rely on the dreamers, who fall in love with starry eyes and spirit that is hard to capture – they WANT the romance and the adventure, but HATE the unsecurity and the RISK that comes along with being, well- YOU-

Because this is the REAL problem with being a dreamer.

The

Dreams

Don’t

Stop.

They continue and they get bigger and bigger and you dream of doing more and helping more and serving more.  Always, more more more. 

Yes you know that your own dreams leave you yourself quite breathless sometimes, and your own mind racing to catch up with itself, and even in your own heart and mind you struggle to realise – how on earth how am I actually going to DO everything that I want to do? And so you completely understand why to someone who is attached to you might not truly ever be able to get their head around what on earth you are doing or WHY you are doing it or even any of it whatsoever;  you completely understand that you come across as an overwhelming, head-exploding, big bundle of RISK to MOST PEOPLE but this doesn’t ever hold you back or stop you

Because you know

You will get there

And so you just go on and DO it, you MAKE your dreams a reality in every step that you take whether they fail or falter or fly, every movement is a movement forward.

And sometimes our REAL dreams for our business + life lay hidden for YEARS, it can be so hard to say THIS? THIS IS NO LONGER REMAINING JUST A DREAM and bringing it into the light to become the living and breathing thing that you truly WANT and desire, but the point here that I am trying to make to you is this.

You are a dreamer.

It is why you are here.

It is why you started your business in the first place.

It’s because you dared to want something MORE.

And even if you quit or leave or pause or break – the dreams have begun now, they’ve been opened and are swirling around and they will NEVER stop.

You can’t put the genie back in the bottle.

So what are you going to do, really?

Are you going to let those who refuse the way of the dreamer hold you back?

Are you going to let the ‘we can’t afford it’ the ‘your business isn’t making any money’ the ‘you’re just a dreamer’

hold you back?

And if you know damn well you’ve already popped that cork, your dreams are in full flow, everything is going beautifully or at least in the general vague direction that it is supposed to and this ISN’T defined by income or profit but instead just the feeling of KNOWING;

are you going to let those FEARS that everyone else holds for you-

the ‘don’t ruin it’ ‘don’t mess it up’ ‘don’t put all of your eggs in one basket’ ‘don’t risk what you have’

are you going to let THOSE hold you back now?!?!

If I could tell you something this morning. As I sit with my coffee, staring out at the mountains, it would be this-

WANT WHAT YOU WANT.

Dream how you want to dream.

There will always be those who love you who are risk-averse, fearful; those who think smaller than you do, or who – with terrific sadness – you seem to be pulling away from, as you follow the only path and way that you know, dreamer.

Because the thing is- they most likely will not see the world in the way that you do, when you want them to, on your timeframe, in YOUR way. 

As full of endless and unlimited opportunity, as defined by YOU.

It is not your job to be their teacher. To try to persuade or convince them otherwise. To spend your precious energy and words pouring into ears that are not ready to hear and a heart that is not ready to open.

And you do not need to leave them, just like you do not leave your dreams.

You just go on and BE.

Be who you are supposed to be, want what you want.

Because otherwise, what is the cost?

To cage yourself, in golden bars maybe, but with the spirit of who you are always seeking an exit?

To dream smaller, perhaps, or to stop dreaming all together?

To perhaps maybe, seek + find more joy in being in the present, in the everyday, in the BEING here + now- but then always to have that small part of you that you ignore, that part that whispers to you when you are alone and staring out of a window – what if…?

And that is why I take deliberate and specific time to daydream, staring at the mountains, turned towards the delicate morning.

THIS is how we forget a business grows, when we are full to the brim of deadlines and sessions and diaries and online marketing.

THIS is how the dreamer makes her dreams reality.

When the dreaming never stops.

When the dreams are nurtured.

When the dreams are given the permission they need to become a reality.

Let those who say dreaming is tiring or pointless or a waste of time say whatever it is they need to.

You know that without the dream, without the heart, without the intention, the goal, the focus-

Business? It’s just a series of steps designed to make you money, and it can and will, but happiness? You know happiness isn’t found in the money.

It’s in the pursuit of your artist’s heart + your soul + in following who you are and who you are supposed to be. It’s following that thing, that feeling- that says to you, you must do this, and do it regardless, every single day. And sometimes the words will be quiet and sometimes they will scream at you, but regardless you KNOW that you have no choice really – follow the call and be happy, or ignore it or smother it and always, always feel that PAIN- and that’s the only way to describe it – that pain of longing or wondering, for things to be different-

So right now I want to ask you –

Are you making time to deliberately daydream for yourself and your business?

Are you letting the thoughts + opinions of others, of society, hold you back from being who you are supposed to be?

Are you dreaming SMALL, or are you too scared to dream in the way that you want to for your business?

Are your daily actions moving you towards the direction of your dreams?

Who are you letting hold you back right now and what do you need to do to move forward?

Leave a comment below- I’d love to hear from fellow dreamers <3


 

Want to join more dreamers + BIG ACTION TAKERS in business? Check out Shining Lights, here.

 

 

Filed Under: INSPIRE, LIFE

What To Do When You Have A Complaint + It Feels Like The World Is About To End

August 10, 2015 by The FCA Leave a Comment

What To Do When You Have A Complaint + It Feels Like The World Is About To End

There are hugely brilliant days in business, and there are hugely sad and awful and tough days in business.

There are days when you feel elated, on cloud nine, and there are days when you feel like you’re not quite sure if you can hold it all together for much longer and you’re a pin-cushion waiting to implode upon the next pin.

For many of us, that sense of terrific FAILURE- because there is no other word for it,  those days when it feels like your business is about to truly and spectacularly fail- come out of the blue.

Because it comes with an email from a client that takes your breath away.

There you are, quite happy in your work – blissfully happy, even. Perhaps that’s why- I wonder often whether there is an unwritten law of balance in the Universe, where you are not allowed to be entirely happy for too long. Because you can be creative and in flow and running your business beautifully and everything is all going to plan

And then an email from a client – a client you cared about, felt you connected with, spend time emotionally investing into your session – knocks you over.

And your heart kind of feels like it’s being squeezed and you can feel it speeding up at the same time and your thoughts begin to swim as you try and regain some sense of understanding.

‘what? I just don’t understand!’ followed by tears – and there have been many tears. 

Because that’s the thing with complaint clients, isn’t it? often they come without warning, or perhaps even if you know they are brewing they sometimes come at you with such force your body reacts physically. You can’t eat, sleep, and can’t think straight. Your head goes around in circles trying to figure out what on earth happened.

All you can think about is this, and it consumes you from the inside out. 

And if you’ve never had a complaint? Congratulations. I salute you.

But this is reality for those of you reading this who do know what it’s like to stand in these shoes, to be here as your business sits in front of your eyes and you feel it falling away from you; this thing you love, the thing you work so hard for; as you watch someone take repeated blows at it.

And that’s just it – no matter how hard you work, no matter how much integrity or love or courage or dedication you give to your business – you just cannot make every single person happy. 

Perhaps there was something that went wrong beyond your control. Perhaps there is something you did that others would have done differently. Perhaps your kit failed, perhaps your communication wasn’t flawless, perhaps you took on too much but struggled through it, perhaps your personalities just clashed, perhaps there were other emotions and circumstances that were involved but you became the unwitting target of emotion, perhaps there were any number of reasons + infinity why you received these words, these words that drown you from within, because the bottom line is we are all so very human-

and we screw up.

We screw up small time and we screw up big time and we screw up without even realising we have screwed up and we screw up and fail to meet the expectations of others and we screw up in any number of ways that we are often not even aware of until

BOOM

out of nowhere comes the list of accusations, truths, mistruths, heightened emotions and passion.

And you’re left wondering – where the hell did I sign up for THIS??

And darling, you didn’t. 

Nobody signs up for this.

Nobody would CHOOSE to have this happen to them, and no matter what we do to prevent them from happening sometimes SHIT HAPPENS.

And you can’t do a thing about it no matter how much you care or cry and want to change everything even though at the time there is nothing you could have done differently anyway, and even now you probably wouldn’t because the reality is

You can’t please everybody all of the time, and

Not everybody will love you.

In fact some people will downright hate you and go out of their way to make hurtful comments, share how crap you are on facebook and in their social circle and online, and basically do everything they can to make your life a misery.

Why? who knows why?

It doesn’t matter. 

All that matters is that this hurts. It hurts beyond belief.

Yes you can remain calm. Professional. Provide the expected apologies, ask what you can do make this better but the real hard truth is sometimes

You just can’t make this better. Not on the inside- your inside.

And that is what really SUCKS in business.

You just can’t make this agony better, and you can’t fix it, and nobody seems to quite grasp that feeling that is haunting you all day long, that sticks with you day in day out, even if you did NOTHING WRONG –

You still feel desperately, desperately sad, because this is your business + your baby and you’ve worked so hard for this and then- THIS!

That feeling like everyone is talking about you behind your back.

The unfairness.

The unjustness.

The FEAR and of COURSE I was afraid!

Afraid I couldn’t fix something I didn’t even know I had broken.

Afraid of broken relationships in a life and world full of broken relationships. Afraid of  the loss- the emotional loss because if you’re anything like me then you truly CARE about your clients, they’re NEVER just another pay cheque to you, but people you actually CONNECT with and like, even adore, and you fear the loss and the disapproval and another thing – aren’t we all raised to want to be loved? We fear that even if we don’t know it, even if it’s from complete strangers let alone people you care about which is why we all give a damn about online trolls and they still hurt us even if we know they are meaningless-  

All our emotion bound up in fear that you’re not even sure what to do with anymore.

And the worst part is? You feel alone.

Like this is the worst thing that could happen (you know it isn’t) and like this will never rest (eventually- it will because everything does eventually) and like this will change your entire life (and worst case scenario – it might, but who is to say that change might not be for the better and was ordained BECAUSE the change is necessary)?

and that you can’t tell anyone and barely dare not even WHISPER it to other photographers because hey- they’ll think you’re a complete FAILURE right? Like you REALLY MESSED UP in a way that NO OTHER PHOTOGRAPHER WOULD DO (even if you didn’t you still FEEL like this is how they’ll think) and so you dare not say a word and you just sit and feel miserable, and wretched, and alone.

Well, I’m writing to tell you that you’re not alone. 

This has happened to me.

It’s really crap and it really hurts. AND – shocker – it was one of the reasons I decided to quit shooting weddings.

Not because I am a quitter. Not because I don’t take criticism and use it to grow.

But because this experience showed me that there was another way for ME.

That I needed to bring more of what I LOVE into my photography business and use THAT. Writing, coaching, mentoring, blogging- I was doing all of those things anyway, I just decided to do more of them, and shoot less. Because that was what this taught me.

But still- the storm lingers and refuses to leave. 

But that’s ok -because it just shows us what we have to do. What we are SUPPOSED to do. 

Because? the even tougher truth is, this is business.

Every day in every single business across the world, items are being returned, complaints are being made, other business owners screw up and fail in a myriad of ways.

It’s part and parcel of being in business. That’s not me being blase and telling you not to care, but it should give you 

-perspective on the reality – and that’s what you need first and foremost. 

This NOT the end of your business, or your life, or your career, or your future, and the whole world isn’t going to hate you. 

Although you KNOW all this really , don’t you? But the reality is – dealing with this stuff is SO HARD, and it’s the stuff they DON’T tell you about in workshops, or in class– about how you will FEEL when this happens. 

And when this happens, when you feel like this – all you can do is follow one more cliche-

-Ride out the storm.

But it’s true. Ride out the rainy days in business, even if they are tough and hard and FEEL lonely

Because we know – that this happens to all of us. Even the best of us. I’m not the first photographer this has happened to – in fact almost every photographer I’ve ever worked with has had this happen in one way or another.

And it won’t break you. It will simply bend and shape and mould you and point you in the direction in which you are meant to go. 

Perhaps you will change pathway all together, like I have done.

Or perhaps you will carry on down the same route, and it will be no less beautiful and no less shiny for you. 

But whatever route you end up along, as the storm and winds lash you and you want to cry out – this is enough! I’ve had enough! Know this-

I will stand with you. Photographers all over the world, all who have been at the receiving end of bitching, of criticism, of unkindness, of untruthfulness, of hurt and lies and pain and confusion – they all stand with you too. 

We have all been there. 

You are not alone. 

I understand. And I want to take your hurt and pain away, but distraction does a good job too- ten minutes downstairs with my beautiful daughters completely refreshed my perspective and made me get a grip on the world again, to know that as long as we are all ok- I AM OK-

But for those times when you feel alone-

These words are for you. 

This is business. You are getting better at it every time you fail. So let the winds carry you where they may. Feel the emotion but do not fear it.

In the end, it doesn’t matter – and this is not the end.

It’s just a storm, storms pass,

and know you do not stand in this one alone. 

 

Love + Light xox

 


 

Want more support? Join the FPA free group for photographers, here. 

Filed Under: INSPIRE, LIFE

Stop Treating Your Photography Business Like A JOB + EARN MORE

January 19, 2015 by The FCA 4 Comments

Stop Treating Your Photography Business Like A JOB + EARN MORE

2015-01-19_0094

About 2 years ago, I met up with one of my photographer friends.

We were at a glittering, beautiful event and obviously, obviously, talking shop. How many weddings have you had this year? I asked.

And I asked not because I gave a flying monkeys as to whether his answer was a ‘good amount’ or not – which always seems to be the case, right? We judge whether we are doing ‘good’ or ‘bad’ in comparison to how many bookings we have. I’ll get on to why I asked him in just a second.

Anyway so he replied – 45.

FORTY FIVE weddings. How do YOU feel about that number?

Do you feel like that’s amazing and you’d love that amount of bookings? Like he must be doing incredibly ‘well?’ Or do you think – yes! That’s about right, that’s my goal for the year.

Get this. The reason I asked him was because he looked completely and utterly exhausted. I mean, I’ve never seen anyone look so tired.

Both of us have children and when he said to me ’45’ and I then asked him ‘what?? Why on earth do you do so many!’ His reply was

‘I have a mortgage to pay’.

And I felt like saying and you have children to PLAY with.  Because he also told me that he was working all of the hours under the sun. Not just editing, shooting; but working harder to grow his business further.

Listen – it’s not for me to tell you what your goal for your business should or shouldn’t be.

But just know that if your grand plan is to cram in as many bookings as you can in order to earn the most amount of money possible in order to be able to pay your mortgage/ car payments / bills / flight to Jupiter –

What you’re doing is not running that dream of a creatively-rich, passionate + inspired, healthy and WEALTHY business that you dreamed of when you first took the decision to become a photographer.

This is what you have instead.

A JOB.

A job where you trade your time for money.

A job, just like any other job.

The bonus being you get to work from home in your pjs. right? You are your own boss? You work when you want to work and you can go for a gym session whenever you like. You might be there to cuddle your kids when they need you?

Except you’re possibly so tired from crazy editing marathons that in all honesty, handling a crying baby right now when you know that argh- I just have to finish editing this wedding! feels like it could possibly tip you over the edge. Or perhaps your kids are your favourite way of hiding from and procrastinating against all that work that has to be done, which means that your business is heading for disaster anyway.

Trust me – I’ve been there. I have two, remember. And I would much rather work less and earn more than work my fingers to the bone and never see these smiling shining faces- it just doesn’t make sense OR sit with my grand purpose for my life + what I want from it.

So let’s say you don’t have kids, or you might not even have a mortgage to pay. Let’s say you work 45 weddings a year and work roughly from 10am – 6pm on your business, most days.

Do you see what that is? That’s still a CORPORATE MENTALITY, just applied to your business. You’re still stuck in that ‘I have to work 9-5 to pay my mortgage’ trap! And by the way, it’s a LIE. Sure, if you LOVE working 8 hours a day so that you can pay your mortgage, that is awesome. I’m truly happy for you.

But it isn’t the only way!! Why do so many of us believe we have to work ‘regular hours’ or worse, ‘all of the hours God sends’ in order to have a brilliant business?? Why do so many of us believe we have to settle for less-than-dreamy clients, (I’m not talking just wedding style here, either. I’m talking about those clients that ask for a discount and then want the moon on a stick thrown in with it), that the only way to pay our bills (at the least) is to work as much as we can and work with clients that make us less than happy to be able to do so?? It’s such a LIE that we have to do those things!

Like I said, if you LOVE working 10-6, and you LOVE shooting 50 weddings a year and EVERY SINGLE ONE of those clients are your dream clients, that is awesome- you’ve got it all figured out.

But it doesn’t work for all of us.

And if you’re reading this and knowing that actually, you’re not living your real dream- yep, the one where you actually have a LIFE, not just a 9-5 JOB, and that you’d love MORE of your dream clients, to work LESS, and to earn MORE, you have to know that it is ENTIRELY POSSIBLE.

I work at most 4 hours a day on my business, and to be honest I am lucky if I get that. (That’s having two toddlers for you).

 

But if I didn’t have two babies I’d be on the beach, at yoga, reading in coffee shops, visiting my widowed neighbour, exploring this beautiful island, writing more books, going to galleries and exhibitions, shooting WAY more personal work (and I don’t mean snaps of my kids. I mean, big, beautiful sprawling projects linked to messy sketchbooks and tons of ideas and test shots and play and experimentation and actual FUN from photography, not just work – this guy confessed he hadn’t shot a personal project in over 2 years) and generally I’d just be living + loving my life as NOT determined by standard ‘office hours’.  And generally, as a family, that is what we do. We walk our dogs for hours some days. We visit our little juice bar that we discovered nestled inside a fruit market and go there daily to get our juices.  The girls absolutely love being at the beach so we are there at least twice a week at the moment, sometimes every day.

2015-01-19_0095

Working a business just for having the privilege of ‘being my own boss’ or ‘being able to go to the gym whenever I like’ is not enough for me.  It’s not anywhere near enough. I don’t run my photography business because I feel ‘lucky’ to be doing something creative + fulfilling. I run it because it is that AND because it is a way for me to live the life I desire.

It took me ages to realise that. I sat through all-night editing marathons for ridiculous deadlines that I gave myself. (Why do we do that)? I crammed in work into baby naptimes and baby bedtimes and baby feeding times, feeling so exhausted I was sure my eyeballs were about to fall out.  I travelled to London and went to an intense workshop with some incredible women when I was two weeks away from giving birth. People had to help me off the train. Seriously. I’ve been away from my babies from before they wake up and got home after they have long fallen asleep. I’ve spent Sundays in such a wedding-coma and with such bad migraines that I’ve had to spend the day in bed. I got to that point where I got over the fact that I felt ‘lucky’ to be running this business, woke up, and realised that it was time to make my business work for me.

On my terms. Not on somebody else’s definition of what my business should look like. No more every single weekend vanishing from my family. No more ‘all-day’ packages. No more trading time for money. No more working whenever I could to try to grow the business.

There is nothing ‘WRONG’ with working 10-6 on your business. With shooting 45+ weddings a year. But you don’t need to believe that is what you HAVE to do in order meet your mortgage payments, in order to have a ‘successful business’.

So when my mentorees come to me and tell me that they work all day on their business, or they’re fully booked all summer, and I say to them – does this make you incredibly happy? Is this what makes your heart + life completely full? A full time photography ‘job’?

– they at first look at me like I am insane – of course this is what I want? Hello, I have a full diary!!  I just want to know how to make more money from it?’

And then I see it click in and it is like fireworks exploding in their heads and reflecting in their face.

Because if you chose photography as a JOB, where you HAVE to do it 24-7 in order to pay the bills- whether you’ve had an overdose of clients or whether you THINK that is what you would like, I guarantee you will fall out of love with it. You lose that creativity, that passion, with that I-think-I-want-to-be-a-photographer nervous yet excited SPARK.

Which is a crying shame. Because when we start out we have so many big, beautiful, hopes and dreams for our business. So much magic caught up both in front of and behind the lens.

Don’t lose that. Don’t let it get sucked into being ‘just another job’ or ‘just another client’ or ‘just another wedding’.

This isn’t a ‘job’. You don’t have to shoot 45 weddings a year and work 10-6 if that isn’t WHAT LIGHTS YOU UP.

And if isn’t what lights you up? Makes you happy every time you sit down and do it??

Seriously; what’s the point?!

Are you living your wildest, wealthiest, biggest dream for your business that it could truly be?

And what about your clients?? Do you love every single one of those clients, are they your dream clients who you adore working with and get excited talking to them about their wedding? Because they are people who you would chose to hang out with outside of work, because you have lives and dreams and interests that you share, that bring you together?

I couldn’t wait for my clients weddings this year. I got excited every time I saw or spoke to them. Beautiful venues, incredible food, dresses I dreamed of. So much love and laughter. Don’t you owe it to your clients to be passionate about each and every single one of them? A client is never, ever just another job. The second you get that ‘another day another dollar mentality’, you are letting down your clients. They deserve more than that, surely. Don’t they deserve a photographer who sees them as more than just ‘another wedding’ or a mortgage repayment?

This isn’t me being idealistic here – I can say all this because I HAVE DONE IT. I earned enough for my husband to leave work and join me in business. To support all of us. Do you think that would be possible if I had continued to trade time for money, to cram my diary with as many bookings as I could?

IS ANY of this sounding close to home? Like you’ve been shooting a ton and working a ton and actually, you WOULD quite like to shoot less, while maintaining (or increasing) your earnings?

Or perhaps you’ve even just been working those standard ‘work days’ and what you’d actually like is a lot more time to spend with your cats, dogs, babycakes, beach or bookcase?

Or perhaps you’ve been dying to fill up your diary with bookings and for some reason it hasn’t quite happened but now you’re wondering if that would actually make you over- the- moon- in love with your life?

This is what you do.

-Set yourself a concrete, solid, financial target for the year. Break it down into how much you need to earn each month to hit that target.

-Figure this out  BEFOREHAND – before you get sucked into saying yes to every booking, every client, every discount that comes your way.

-Keep your prices high. Higher than you feel comfortable with. Know how many bookings you need at this price in order to hit your goal. If you find you are shooting more weddings that you would like to in order to be able to work less, then increase your price.

-Figure out your comfort zone for accepting discounts – how much room do you have to play with by providing a discount, while still meeting your financial goals?

-Diversify your income stream, so you aren’t reliant on just bookings for your income.  This made the biggest difference for me. When I learned how to sell prints to every single client (despite the fact I provided hi-res images), when I learned how to package my albums and sell them at prices that enabled me to hit my financial goals, when I created my books – I noticed a huge difference in both my income and the time I was able to spend working. I still spent the same amount of time working, but there was no longer any pressure to have to hustle, or constantly promote my business.

Running it just became so much simpler, so much easier.

Diversifying your income looks different for everyone. It could include

-albums

-prints

-products

-galleries

-events

-digital products

-courses / workshops

-books

-a blog

-templates / actions / websites

-even an entire movement – like Beloved collective, for example.

Choose the target market that makes your heart happy – whether you shoot weddings, babies, families, boudoir is irrelevant.

Work with clients who are kind + generous + love you. As in, they completely and utterly love and appreciate you and your work. I realised a while ago I loved working within a family environment. You know, those kind of people who invite you into their homes for dinner even if you’re just dropping something off, and always have time for you. Basically, clients who don’t just treat you as a ‘photographer’ but as say, a human being, rather than a camera attached to a pair of legs and eyes.

–Who do you love working with, truly? You need to completely nail down your target client and make sure you are marketing to them, and them only.

-Make sure you have a grand Master Plan for your business so you’re being proactive, not reactive. (And don’t be afraid to change it).

Do what makes you happy- and then figure out how to make money from it.

I did it like this. I love photography and I’m a huge film lover (I love digital too, but for different reasons). I didn’t want to have 45 bookings a year, so I set high prices, found my target clients, stopped giving discounts, began mentoring, and then wrote two books.

Now I have more time with my family, more time to shoot, lovely clients and I’m not editing 24-7. And I fit in lots of beach trips and reading too.

It’s not difficult to decide what your business should look like and how you want it to serve you. And remember that’s what your business is first and foremost.

It’s designed to serve you.

So don’t be a slave to it.

 

You have a choice. Start by designing your grand master plan. Set your financial goal. Figure out what figure you WANT, what you NEED, and then break it down into how much you need + want to bring home each month. Brainstorm how you could gain that figure without having to resort to tiredness, loss of precious time, without having to do less of the things that make you entirely happy. Decide what your dream business looks like, and then design it. 

 

Start now. It’s the perfect time.

Filed Under: INSPIRE, LIFE

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